I'm in a pretty good mood today! Momsy's at some wedding dinner so she can't bother me much. I was doorkeeper [aka usher] for saturday service today. It really rocked! Nwaha. I was in such a good mood that I was happily flashing my braces-ly smile at everybody and sticking out my hands to everybody. By the way, this is the first week I went to church with my braces on. Yepps. Although some of them had sweaty palms and wet hands [eeks!], the rest were okay and quite friendly. Yeah, one of them 'dao-ed' me when I stuck out my hand. Okay fine. Oh yeah, it was rude but oh nothing can spoil my ever-so-perfect day. Yeah right. The sermon was a little on the 'off' side. It was talking about husbands and wives and what they so called should and shouldn't do. Something like that. I'm currently listening to Evermore by Hillsong. Oh boy do I love that song. =) Oh, as I was saying, I am pretty annoyed now with a lot of people. Say I'm childish and petty, whatever. I mean, Jeralyn and I were so supposed to go out after service for just a little short while and like she so dumped me for her sister, literally. She promised me. Oh yeah, she told a lie and liars go to hell. [Proudly quoted from Jeralyn herself]. Michelle and Jinghan were SO totally eager to get rid of me, FINE. So I was stuck with Cheryl, not that it's bad but i mean, I was supposed to go out and all. I haven't went out in a gazillion years. I mean go out as in shop and look at MY stuff and not someone else's. I know my bad point is that when people ask me out or something, I will normally go, unless I've got something on. But it's so unfair that when I'm free and asks someone out, she will either reject or you know, make tons of excuses. So, you want me to be there for you, to accompany you here and there but when I want you to accompany me? What do you do? Disappear in some bush and don't ever come out. Fine. Such people actually exist. I'm not angry or anything. I'm just really really amazed that such people still do exist in this society of ours. I've been through this situation since forever. For example, I'm going out on Friday with person A. I make sure that my whole day has no other dates so that I can be polite and just accomodate and have unlimited time chatting with the person so that I don't ditch the person 'cause that's so MEAN. That is just normal so called etiquette that you don't go out and suddenly say you're off to your fairyland and just leave that person abandoned in some corner in Singapore. That's rude, ungentlemanly [if he's a guy] and projecting an image that you are either [if he's a guy] MCP or you think you're some big shot. Oh puh-lease. Quit the big shot thing. It irks people. Seriously, if you carry on doing that to nearly everybody, you're going to lose all your friends. Like just look at the amount of true friends you have. Your current friends are so superficial that if you died in a car accident today, life would just simply go on as per normal without you, not like they'll even mourn at all. Please. Find your true friends first before talking so much crap and thinking of having to find a bf/gf. I mean, if you already have so little friends and you want to have a bf/gf, chances are that you will have even lesser friends. Even now, if you have few friends, if they're really true friends, it's better than having a million friends and then only having less than a handful of really true friends. Who you think are your true friends may not be. Best friends are just a lie and most of the time they end up your downfall. The so called big shots have millions of friends but none of them really look under the skin 'cause they're all super superficial. Pfft.

I think you should just start taking care of your insecurities first.

The fact is, you're always insecure eh.

Me too.

But get over it

and get used to it.

Yeah. That's all I can say.